I solemnly swear that i am up to no good: private message to fred weasley and amycus carrow

i am so glad you will never read this

i wouldnt write it down at all except if i dont draw out the poison i'll die

when i stopped spewing they were both there smiling at me
'we're going to play a Game,' he said

dudley was there, lying on the table
they had petrificused him

she had brought her case of the Lovelies and she was unpacking them, unfastening the straps

he plucked out the smallest one, the one called Whisper and placed it before me

'you're going to demonstrate your drawing, tidbit
you will take this and draw a little line from one ear to the other--'
he showed me by drawing a finger under the chin
'technique is important
the skin must be parted the entire way'

'not that one'
she took back Whisper and replaced it with the next one up, the one they call Kiss
'it'll be soooooo easy,' she crooned
'she is so very sharp'

my hand started to shake
'i won't' i whispered
'i won't do it'

when was the last time i told him no?
i cant even remember.

he smiled the terrible smile 'you have exactly one minute
if you don't do this thing--' he took out the largest one, the one called Vengeance
'i'll place you under imperio
and who knows what will happen?'
he laughed
he laughed at me
'maybe i'll release it when you're done eating his heart'

i looked down at him
his eyes were wide and terrified
i bent down and whispered in his ear: 'i am so sorry' and 'please stay absolutely still'

as if he could move
as if he could have lifted a finger to stop me

i picked up Kiss with shaking hands
i had to draw the line as shallowly as possible, but still deep enough to part the skin

at the first cut, she gave a hungry little moan, the sound she makes sometimes when he starts to kiss her

blood welled up behind the blade as I went
i could feel my own blood singing in response
like i could feel my own heartbeat in the blade
maybe that was from the blood spells they put on me
i had to retrace one part
then i dropped Kiss and stared down at him as the necklace of blood trickled over his shoulders

she stuck her finger in it and put it into the git's mouth to lick off
then she took my hands and smeared them through the mess

that's all i remember before everything turned dark

when i came back to myself i was in my pallet again
the blood on my hands was dry

i don't even know if he's still alive
i hope the ghost comes soon because then I can ask him

i hate him
i hate him for making me step over the line
i hate him worst of all because he didn't make me
it wasn't imperio
i chose to do it

i am so glad i'll never see hermione again

how she would despise me if she knew